Sometimes, sometimes frequently, changing yourself is required for a relationship. Compromise is the foundation of all relationships. Throughout the course of your relationship, many of these changes will occur naturally; however, others of them will be more difficult adjustments or transitions that will demand a lot of effort from both of you.
There is a delicate line between positive change—change that strengthens and makes you and your spouse happier as a couple—and self-effacement,. There are aspects of yourself that you shouldn’t change, and there are reasons why you shouldn’t change. Never allow yourself to think, “If only I were different, this person would adore me,” or anything similar.
Your partner should love you for who you are at your heart because that core—your soul, your essence, whatever you want to call it—isn’t going to change. This way of thinking is harmful and counterproductive. However, how you communicate with your partner and how you view yourself in the world are things that you can change—and which frequently need to change.
Here are eleven entirely normal ways to change in a relationship that you shouldn’t be critical of yourself for courtesy of Bustle.com.
Health Habits
You can discover that you begin caring for your body in a different way when you’re in a relationship, especially a long-term one. Maybe you give up smoking, start working out more, or change the way you eat. All of those things are intrinsically positive. When you commit to being with someone, especially over an extended period of time, both of your health and theirs are affected. So why not make an effort to look after yourself more?
Your appearance
Again, you shouldn’t have to alter your appearance to please someone you love. Or otherwise you wouldn’t have entered into this entire relationship thing in the first place, so it’s obvious that he or she already thinks you’re attractive. However, that doesn’t mean you can’t let your partner’s viewpoint have an impact on you.
Domestic routines
Your household routines will need to change if you plan to have your S.O. in your home frequently or perhaps live with them. For instance, if you’re a genuine clean freak and your spouse isn’t, you may have to learn to endure some mess , just as they may have to learn to pick up their dirty clothes off the bathroom floor.
How you argue
There will inevitably be problems in relationships, and you could find that the methods you’ve used to resolve them in the past don’t actually work in the relationship you’re in now. What if, for instance, you are feisty and straightforward, but your partner retreats the moment a conflict threatens to arise? Both of you will need to learn how to handle disagreements civilly.
Also see: Green flags in relationships