Relationship breakups are caused by many things; some causes are deep, while some are just light and can be easily forgiven.
The deep reasons include one partner cheating, discovering that one partner has children outside the marriage or relationship, abuse, and many other things that are heavy on the heart.
Light reasons include breakups caused by things such as the one partner having to relocate to a different city or country, asking for time out in order to deal with internal issues, or breaking up over a silly argument that you later realise was not as deep as you thought it was.
For those who are planning to give an ex a second chance, it is important to consider the following points, supplied by Oprah Daily.
Do you both agree on what your past differences were? – In order to iron out the issues that led to the breakup, it is important to figure out and agree on what those problems were in the first place. Failure to do so will bring the reunion honeymoon period to a screeching halt soon after, says relationship expert Rachel Sussman.
Is the main issue that drove you apart resolvable? – Psychologist Cortney Warren states, “There is a reason that the relationship didn’t work the last time you dated — maybe many reasons. Whatever they were contributed to your previous breakup. So, if it’s going to work this time, one or both of you must have evolved.”
Have you conveniently forgotten the darker parts of your relationship? – Rachel expresses a need for the couple to have a really good talk if they consider getting back together. She also adds, “They have to have a true understanding of the narrative of what broke them up. They should be on the same page about that narrative, and they should be on the same page about what needs to change.”
Are you afraid you won’t find someone else? – This is one of the wrong reasons for rekindling former relationships with people. Rachel shares that this is caused by fear. “Fear of being alone, fear of never meeting anybody, fear that this is the last opportunity they’re going to have, fear of dating.” As disappointing as a relationship breakup is, the fear of getting into a new one should not make us end up making choices without thinking.
Also see: 10 Important factors to help keep your relationship healthy
