Parents are not only responsible for bringing life into this world but play a big role in shaping their children’s lives, teaching them what’s right or wrong and creating a safe haven for their children. However, society can also be an influence in the upbringing of your child that whatever you teach at home, there is always someone else who comes with their opinions or way of doing things.
How people parent is different from household to household, we have witnessed mob justice attacks on parents because of the mistake or behavior of their children, there has also been instances where you see some parents being bad examples to their children that they end up going astray whilst there are parents who are good role models but their kids are intent on doing the wrong things.
We have spoken to a local Social Worker, Nomkhitha Thombe, who works with families in Khayelitsha and based on her experience she says “parents get judged quite a lot because of what their children do but there are a lot of ways of looking at it. A parents role is to educate and create awarenesses around their children about the society they live in because there is peer pressure that plays a big role in to a child’s upbringing. When we do parent workshops we help parents understand how to assess a situation first and put judgment last when it comes to parent-child relationship because it always depends on the situation at hand.”
There are definitely different views on the matter and one parent who is a Digital creator stated “We hold women/mothers accountable for too much”
There has been different views about the matter, as a mom of two Zanele Shwane who is also a motivational speaker commented saying, “Children have choices, you can tell the child not to do certain things if he/she decides on doing it, a parent shouldn’t be blamed for it because you did your best as a parent in showing them a right path but at the end they decide what to do.”
“We can carry the blame as parents but we cannot be punished for our children’s behavior” -Says Nina Ntabeni, A parent of 4 kids.
Also see: Dealing with parental burnout
