A friend of mine just spent a week on a solo holiday. It was not her first overseas trip, but previously, she had travelled with her husband and kids.
All hard-working professionals deserve a break. We take leave and mental health days when strain takes its toll on us. Why should parenting be any different? Mothers can take time out from being a mom or wife. Parenting can be challenging, high-pressured and emotional, and a solo trip might be the perfect reset.
Have you ever considered travelling with your husband and leaving your tribe behind? And even more daring, travelling solo?
Apparently, 2023 has been a popular year for solo travellers. It’s been estimated more and more people are ditching their friends or family and exploring the world alone. The number of people googling ‘solo travel’ this year has almost doubled compared to five years ago.
Capetonian Bronwyn Davids has only ever travelled alone, sometimes to countries where she didn’t even know the language or anyone living there. She has visited six continents. ‘I always manage to find my way around without anything untoward happening to me. Knowing you’re on your own in a foreign country, your instincts for self-preservation kick in. Travel is freeing, but with that freedom comes a sense of responsibility,’ she says.
During the holiday season, it’s easy to get bogged down by the demands and expectations of your family: unending gatherings, weddings, traditional festivities, birthday parties etc. And before you know it, your annual leave is over, and you’re headed back to work, depleted of energy and sometimes angry and resentful.
How about a brief holiday?
It’s okay for parents, couples or groups of friends to take holidays without their kids every once in a while. While some people prefer to travel with family, others prefer to do so alone.
Child-free holidays give you a licence to chill and catch your breath. If you have a support system you can rely on and trust, enlist their help by asking them to look after your kids while you and your hubby or friend take a few days’ holiday.
Most of us fear societal judgement, even though time alone with our partners may bring us together and make us better parents. Married couples are more than just a wife, mom, dad or husband. Their days of romance are not over, and they need to take time to remind themselves of their love for each other.
Raising children can take a toll on your free time, sleep, sex life and deep connection with your partner. Those aspects may seem different, and you can feel a distance or wedge between you and your partner.
Unwinding alone is necessary, even if it means taking a local getaway.
Still not convinced?
Here are a few reasons to consider travelling solo:
- Travel has many benefits for your mental health. It’s refreshing and rejuvenating.
- If you are married, a kid-free getaway helps you to reconnect and rekindle your relationship.
- Child-free travel also has the great advantage of allowing you to step down from being a parent for a few days and let go of the pressure of looking after others.
- You have time to laugh and flirt.
- You get an opportunity to read a book or have a glass of wine without any interruptions.
- You treasure uninterrupted sleep.
Solo travel has other advantages too. Bronwyn lists those as being:
- You learn to read the environment and sense no-go zones.
- You get to know yourself very well, for example, how far you are prepared to go for the sake of curiosity and experiencing something new. ‘The life skills you learn from solo travel stay with you long after the impressions of other people, places and cultures have lost their shine’, adds Bronwyn.
- Travelling without kids can also be an opportunity to meet new people and make friends.
For Bronwyn, her next trip will see her fulfil her love for great modern art, design and architecture or experience eco-friendly cities that embrace the green ethos. ‘I still have to go to Antarctica. But
over the years of learning more about climate change and touching the Earth lightly, as the Australian Aboriginal saying goes, I would rather have the places under threat of climate disaster survive than tick the been-there-done-that checklist’.
Whether you want to explore a new country, take a walk by the beach, or hike roads less travelled, every effort you make in investing in self-care improves your relationship with your spouse and kids, even yourself. So, pack your bags. Just think how much you will get to relax and reclaim your identity and passion!
Originally published for print in BONA Magazine
Writer: Bulelwa Payi
Also see: Heading to Europe this Christmas? Here’s 6 common pickpocketing scams you should know
