Dating after a divorce is often met with mixed emotions by those who have gone through the process and looking to get in the dating market again. For some, it can be nerve wrecking as the fear of emotionally investing in another relationship that might end may creep in. For others, this can be an exciting time as they look forward to meeting a partner that will treat them better and love them differently.
While the thought of a new relationship may be exciting, there are many things to consider before getting into a new relationship. Below are four points to help you when considering dating after a divorcé as provided by Love Zoid USA.
Consider What You’re Searching For
When you start dating, take a second to consider what you’re really looking for. Do you want another marriage partner? Are you looking for casual fun? Do you want another long-term relationship? It’s common for your feelings to change after a divorce. In the past, you may have prioritised serious relationships, but now you might want to experience a light fling. This is completely normal, but it’s crucial that you can identify what you want — this will make life easier once you start meeting people.
Value Yourself
Unfortunately, many divorcees rush out into the dating scene and find themselves breaking their backs trying to meet the needs of potential partners. One of the most important tips to remember is to value yourself and your needs. Be selfish and put yourself first when dating, there’s never any reason to start putting a potential date’s feelings in front of your own! This will weed out anyone incompatible and you’ll be left with dates that respect your boundaries.
Be Honest
Finally, make sure you go into dating honestly. Being vulnerable can be scary, but it’s far better to start a new relationship with trust and honesty than with lies about the past. Divorces are normal, so don’t be ashamed of your past. This will also signal you have healed and you’re emotionally mature too – this is more attractive than secrets and lies! You might also want to consider dating other divorcees as they will understand your situation better than those that have never married.
Contemplate Counseling
While this tip won’t work for everyone, a few short counseling or therapy appointments can do wonders for your mindset when you’re starting to date again. The stigma around these services is quickly fading and many consider it impressive when their partners are emotionally intelligent enough to seek help. An experienced professional can guide you through the initial dating process, allowing you to make the most of the experience.
Also see: How to maintain an emotional connection through conversation
