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Valentine’s Day has a way of making love feel like it’s everywhere—roses at every checkout, heart-shaped chocolates lining the shelves, and couples posting grand gestures online. However, when you’re spending your first Valentine’s without the one person you used to celebrate it with, the day can feel less like a celebration and more like a reminder of what’s missing.
Grief doesn’t follow a calendar, and there’s no right or wrong way to get through February 14th, what matters most is giving yourself the grace to feel however you need to—because love, in all its forms, doesn’t disappear.
The Heather Stang publication suggests that you honour your partner’s memory on this day by visiting their gravesite, writing them a love letter, sharing stories about them, or visiting a place that you two used to love going g to. Alternatively, it is mentioned that you can enjoy a self-care retreat with chamomile tea at home, “Take the day off, grab your grief journal, order a good meal, and pour your heart out. There is nothing wrong with, and everything right about, giving yourself the self-care you deserve.”
According to Psychology Today, it is important to allow yourself to feel sad, adding that “This both refers to giving yourself permission to feel sad but also clearing your schedule to anticipate that you may experience grief triggers on the actual day.”
To cope with grief on Valentine’s Day, it’s important to ignore the traditions that come with the day and focus on doing something that makes you feel good, states the Bateman Allen Funeral Home website. Instead, it is advised that you create your own traditions that will resonate with you and honour your deceased loved one.
The above publication also suggests that you reach out to others and do good for them, whether it’s by calling family or doing something together. Carrying the memory of your loved one with you on holidays can help you feel less alone.
Also see: Planning a movie night for Valentine’s? Here are a few movies you can choose from