Photo of Johana Mukandila

6 Relationship myths debunked

So many people hold onto misguided beliefs about relationships, marriage and intimate relationships which lead to an unhealthy relationship.

Read more to explore the relationship myths which have been debunked. There are some common relationship myths that offer a fresh perspective. By challenging these myths, you can build healthier and happier relationships.

Love is enough

Love is not enough because, in the majority of marriages, spouses stop pursuing one another and stop prioritising romance, great sex, excitement, and adventure. This is especially true when a baby is born. Relationships have a propensity to devolve into never-ending to-do lists, with interaction limited to running errands. These aspects of a relationship must be consciously prioritised (or maintained).

Talking about past emotional wounds will only make them worse

The past is never truly gone, according to Faulkner. There is still time. Processing emotional harm from the past is feasible. The past cannot be changed, but you can alter how you remember and describe it.

Happy couples don’t fight

In reality every relationship experiences conflict, whether that’s a romantic, familial or platonic one. Sure, a certain amount of fighting can be damaging to a relationship, but that doesn’t mean that your relationship should be without conflict or disagreement.

The trick to maintaining a healthy relationship through conflict is fighting fair so that you and your partner can continue to work through problems with your relationship and this could be done by seeking help from a third party or going to counselling.

You have to date someone for a number of years or time before living together or getting married

Reality: There are many different situations that lead to marriage and sustained living together. There hasn’t been any conclusive research to show how long before getting engaged determines whether a relationship will last forever.

On the other hand, certain patterns indicate that your chances of long-term success will increase if you date for a year to two before moving in together, getting hitched, or both.

The majority of the time, experts advise this to give you time to get to know your partner better, but there are always exceptions to the norm. Most of us have heard of at least one couple who met, had a brief but successful romance, and quickly committed to one another.

The best indicator of a successful relationship is not the amount of time spent together, but a non-scientific combination of self-awareness and insight. If you can bring what you’ve learned about yourself and your needs from previous relationships to your current one then you’re far likely to use that information to work with your partner to more readily resolve conflicts.

Jealousy is a sign of Love

Jealousy is often a sign of insecurity, and feeling secure in a relationship is very important.

You change for someone if you love them

Compromise is normal in a healthy and happy relationship, but you should be compromising on the relationship – not the person. If you have to change yourself to be with someone, you will struggle to be happy with them.

Also see: 3 Signs that the man you are dating is a married man

In seeking community, are group chats replacing third spaces?

In an increasingly digital world, the desire for community and human connection remains central to humanity. Whether young or old, everyone seeks it. Due to a dwindling global economy, third spaces are becoming obsolete. Also see: Preparing your pets for the festive season Younger generations find themselves joining group chats to supplement the benefits of participating […]

Read more...

How to manage stress as the year comes to an end

As the year draws to a close, many people may find themselves feeling mentally and physically exhausted. Work deadlines, financial pressures, family commitments and the desire to finish the year on a high note can all contribute to mounting stress. Also see: Feeling unwell? These physical signs could be linked to stress While occasional stress […]

Read more...

Pitso Mosimane begins 2nd Bafana Bafana stint with crucial win

Bafana Bafana earned a hard-fought 2-1 victory over Guinea in their opening AFCON qualifier on Saturday afternoon. Also see: Pitso Mosimane wants Bafana Bafana to build Springboks-style squad depth Pitso Mosimane’s long-awaited return to the Bafana Bafana dugout got off to an incredible start on Saturday afternoon, with South Africa digging deep to secure a hard-fought […]

Read more...