Kurni Joshlin Hudson (37) shares her heart-wrenching story on overcoming rape and abuse at the hands of the men who were supposed to love her. By Bridgette Matjuda Images Facebook
Born on 9 December 1980, Kurni Joshlin Hudson’s life has been filled with a lot of pain. She grew up in a household where she constantly witnessed her father physically abusing her mother, and making a public spectacle of her. When she was seven years old, Kurni was raped by her father’s close friend. When she confided in him about it, her father told her that she must have enticed him. Additionally, divorces were a norm within her family. Both sets of her grandparents are divorced, including her sister and brother. She, herself, has been married three times. Of her three siblings, only her younger brother is happily married. Pain was around her throughout her childhood, which is no surprise that at some point, she thought that she was born unlucky.
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A few weeks before her 19th birthday, she married her first husband as a way to escape her painful circumstances. The marriage only lasted for two years because the husband turned out to be abusive and he almost stabbed her to death. She ran away and lived on the streets of Atlantis, Cape Town, for over a year, and then went back home. “I got a free divorce in 2002 because he was abusive. The police accompanied me to drop off the divorce papers, and even then, he was violent and caused a scene,” she recalls. When she was 27, she married her second husband. She says,”I didn’t love him at all, he was just a meal ticket.” As a result, the marriage lasted for less than a year. Again, she went back home to live with her family. Just when Kurni Joshlin Hudson had lost all hope, she met her current husband, Bishop Romeo Hudson. They met through Facebook in 2013, and he proposed a day later! She then moved in with him and they got married a few months later.
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When asked how she overcame her painful past, Kurni shares: “I don’t know how I did it, but God has been gracious to me. My husband has apologised to me on behalf of all the men who hurt and did me wrong throughout my life. He apologised for every man who harmed my spirit. I knew then that he was the one. He taught me about forgiveness, and joined me on the road to healing. He taught me that forgiveness is not dependent on the perpetrator asking for forgiveness; I had to forgive them so that I can be free.” Kurni says that she chooses to honour and love her father. “I have forgiven my mother too, but it was difficult because I felt that she was supposed to protect me. But, I realised that my pain was furthest from her mind because she was suffering abuse at the hands of my father, and had her own demons to face.”
Romeo and Kurni Joshlin Hudson have five children. “I’m the happiest I’ve ever been in my life. In all things, God has been faithful,” she concludes.