Getting a little too comfortable at the water boiler with an interesting colleague can turn into a complex situation, especially if one or both of you are interested in more than just a casual chat.
We are social beings and naturally get attracted to the energy of other people. We draw close to them and form emotional bonds. This behaviour, however, is not limited to a strictly “social” setting – even in the workplace, we are drawn closer to some people compared to others. However, when an attraction turns into romantic interest, your work is always affected – whether directly or indirectly. Always be prepared for the consequences.
Issues at home should not make it into the office
Should you find yourself in a romantic relationship at work, make sure neither of you affects the other. A fight between the two of you at home has the potential to stifle your relations at work, and as a result alienate fellow colleagues. Also consider that power roles in the office and at home are very different and it is important to respect both.
Office gossip
People are always talking and rumours are bound to make their rounds, whether false or true. Be sure that your relationship is strong and can stand the test of time even when blown from all sides. Also be prepared for what’s to come. If you are dating a senior and you receive a promotion, for instance, be ready to hear that you were favoured because of your significant other.
Independence
It is important in any relationship to have some level of independence. In this situation, the importance is imperative. Since you will be spending time with your partner both at work and home, it is important that you both have other hobbies and activities that allow you some time away from each other.
Friendships
Your friendship with certain collegues will need to be limited in terms of the information you share with them about your relationship. Do not overshare! Anything personal you share about your partner and your relationship will affect their status and reputation in the office. Keep the conversations light and always be considerate of how your partner will be viewed after.
It’s over, now what?
Never get into a relationship at your workplace if you are not yet prepared to lose your job. It sounds like a tough choice but is the truth. The possibility of a break-up between the two of you is real and should not be taken for granted. Are you okay with seeing your ex everyday at work or having to report to them, attending the same events (with the possibility of seeing them with a new person in their life)? If not, you might consider resigning, but even so, work will not be the same with the other person no longer there. Every piece of furniture in the room and even an empty silence in the office will remind you of them.
